Where Have All the Good Men Gone?

There are some days when I'm glad I'm not a director.

As I had mentioned previously, I have been cast in a play. Since I don't want to be a complete Sucky McSuckerson, for Ereek's sake, I've decided to talk about it (or maybe I was waiting until everyone in the cast had been informed ;).

The show is called Possible Worlds, by John Mighton and it goes up at the end of January.

To be honest, I was surprised when I got the part. The director is a friend of mine and he had specifically told me that he didn't see me in the part. Fair enough, I thought. I've already done two shows with him as well, so I understood that it might also be nice to use different people. But I went out and auditioned anyway. I fell in love with the script at first glance. It must have showed when I auditioned because I managed to change his mind about casting me.

Nancy, that's great and all, but how does this make you not want to be a director?

Ah, I'm getting to that.

You see, the other little thing I know is that he had a lot of trouble finding people to come out and audition (and this is the part where I have to fight real hard with the evil little voice in my head that tells me I may have gotten the part by default). That's the part that I don't envy of directors and, to be honest, I can't even begin to understand why it happens.

The show calls for four men and one women. Now, while I get that there will always be more women auditioning for less parts than men (this is where I tell that evil little voice to bite me because there were way more women to audition than men, so there!), I don't understand how so few people would come out to audition.

All I have been hearing in Ottawa recently is how there is never any work. Yet, when work with a good director presents itself, people don't show up (and no-shows are a whole other can of worms that I don't understand). What gives? What happened to if you audition it, they will come? Was it just not advertised enough? If that's the case, where can you advertise? Has everyone suddenly jumped on board the Equity ship? Are people just busy? If so, busy doing what?

It's really hard for me to comprehend this situation. I want to perform more than anything else in the world. It doesn't matter how busy I get, if the opportunity presents itself to perform I jump on it. Personal relationships, work, social life, they all suffer and I don't care. When performing is your life, you don't need anything else.

I'm probably in the minority on this. I know people have families and obligations. While I understand how important those things are to them, that's also the main reason I don't see myself starting a family anytime soon. I will not be tied down to anything that gets in the way of my dreams. I'm lucky that Darcy is cool with that. Or maybe he just hasn't woken up yet and realized what kind of machine he's gotten himself involved with.

Please be aware that this is not a dig at anyone who might be reading this. This is my personal choice and I'm really just babbling to reinforce my conviction that it's the right choice for me.

You know what was good? June was good. Acting class from 10am to 4pm, rushing to a two hour rehearsal for a Fringe show, performing in an OLT show later that night, and then having drinks with either classmates or castmates before starting all over again in the morning. You throw in an overnight shoot and I would have been in Heaven. Do I sound completely insane? To most people I probably do. But you know what? Not once during that month of June was I ever tired. I was always jazzed and excited and happy to be where I was.

That, my friends, is a good life.


And I want it back